The One without Comfort

Question: Am I ready to REALLY trust God? Better yet, am I ready to trust him so much I become uncomfortable? 

--God doesn't call us to be comfortable. He calls us to trust Him so completely that we are unafraid to put ourselves in situations where we will be in trouble if He doesn't come through. (Francis Chan) 

This is the latest lesson God has been teaching me. 

        And I am FINALLY getting excited about it.  

    I've always said I don't like to live in a sense of comfort. 

Perhaps that's why I would go live in a mud hut without a second thought. 

        But that's not where God is currently calling me. 

   He knows I would be too comfortable in a mud hut. 

                     However, I am uncomfortable getting a middle-class job in America. 

           In fact, this has paralyzed me with fear from applying to jobs until recent weeks.

      I fear I will get stuck living 'the American dream'

               For me personally, I get upset about this idea. 

I think it's great for others, but not for me. 

  I fear getting a job after graduation because I fear I will get stuck. 

               But then again, I have graduation in less than a month and I will be jobless. 

Which used to terrify me just as much as I am afraid of getting stuck in middle class America. 

           I clearly have an internal struggle. 

                    I am ready to be done with school. 

      I am ready to move onto the next chapter. 

                But I have no idea what that looks like. 

   It's been constantly on my mind, nagging me daily. 

           But I've learned so much about trusting God. 

      While I've trusted God before, this is a new kind of trust I'm learning. 

It's trusting God without a safety net. 

                    I am getting really excited about this! 

        But I couldn't get this excited about trusting God and not knowing what happens June 1 until a recent, interesting lesson from God. 

     Saturday, I was in Arizona 4-wheeling with some friends. 

I was in the rear and had just watched my friend almost flip her ATV going up a slight cliff (before she actually did). 

          That freaked me out. 

      I didn't want to go after that. 

  As I sat there contemplating, yelling to my friends I can't do it.

         God screamed very blatantly "DO YOU TRUST ME?" 

 He meant it in that very moment and He also meant it overall in life- in my next step in life. 

        Naturally I said yes, but then I had to take a moment to really think about that question. 

   A few moments later, I rode up that stupid, small cliff perfectly fine. 

I had just put myself in a position where I was not comfortable.

     I spent the remaining 4 hours riding the ATV deep in thought about trust.

             Sunday, my roommates unknowingly spoke confirmation about this and now 

I can happily say I am in a very different place with my trust in God. 

I am in a position where I am uncomfortable with June 1 coming closer and closer, 

yet I am excited about it. 

I know it is going to be ok because God created this planet and is in control- 

He wouldn't just abandon me. 

       I am so excited to be in a place where I am uncomfortable and I would be in trouble if God didn't come through!

Peace.